Billy Pacholski

Recently, I read a woman who was having trouble with some anger in her life. She just felt angry all the time. At people, at events, at her child, even at her pet. Here’s the kicker – she had no idea why she was so angry. Everything in her life was fine. But she had tried everything, and she just couldn’t make her anger go away.

In the reading, I found an energy picture that went something like this: She was a kid at Christmas, and in front of her was a mound of presents. Each one was fine. They were nice gifts. She was happy with them. But there were other kids all around her opening up their gifts, and their gifts were awesome! New, high tech toys. Fancy Barbie dream houses. All sorts of things that seemed magical and exciting. In this picture, she was angry and pouty and sad. She wanted what everyone else was getting! She wanted magic!

Upon a deeper look, it became clear that in this picture (and therefor her life) she had given up her right to ask for what she wanted. In fact, she had deferred to her parents to decide “what she was going to get for christmas” for her. And it’s not that the things she’d been given – or the life they had picked for her – was bad, or wrong. In fact it was quite nice. But it wasn’t what she would have picked for herself. She wanted something different; something more.

You see, her parents wanted her to be safe, and to be happy. They had the best of intention. They chose some nice toys for her. It was the best way they knew how to provide those things for her life. And it’s not that they were wrong or cruel or wanted to take advantage of her – but as she grew into the woman she is today, those things have become less relevant. They have become less of what she would pick for herself.  She felt guilty for wanting something different or more when what she had been given – what was decided she should have – was so nice. Who was she to ask for more or different when so many people had so little? Who was she to say no to her parents ideas of what her life should be like? This was the genesis of the anger that had been afflicting her. Guilt of being unhappy, and for wanting more control on her “Christmas gift list.”

When I asked her what in her life she would change if she had the freedom to do so, without consideration for what anyone else would think or say to her, she quickly replied – “everything.”

I told her she’s got a lot of work to do, then.

A little bit about the history of Halloween.
(from wikipedia)

Halloween has origins in the ancient festival known as Samhain (pronounced sow-in or sau-an), which is derived from Old Irish and means roughly “summer’s end”. This was a Gaelic festival celebrated mainly in Ireland and Scotland. However, similar festivals were held by other Celts – for example the festival of Calan Gaeaf (pronounced kalan-geyf) which was held by the ancient Britons.

The celebration has some elements of a festival of the dead. The ancient Celts believed that the border between this world and the Otherworld became thin on Samhain, allowing spirits (both harmless and harmful) to pass through. The family’s ancestors were honoured and invited home whilst harmful spirits were warded off. It is believed that the need to ward off harmful spirits led to the wearing of costumes and masks. Their purpose was to disguise oneself as a harmful spirit and thus avoid harm. In Scotland the spirits were impersonated by young men dressed in white with masked, veiled or blackened faces. Samhain was also a time to take stock of food supplies and slaughter livestock for winter stores. Bonfires played a large part in the festivities. All other fires were doused and each home lit their hearth from the bonfire. The bones of slaughtered livestock were cast into its flames. Sometimes two bonfires would be built side-by-side, and people and their livestock would walk between them as a cleansing ritual.

Another common practise was divination, which often involved the use of food and drink.

The name Halloween and many present-day traditions, derive from the Old English era.

In the 800s, the Catholic Church measured the day as starting at sunset, in accordance with the Florentine calendar. Although All Saints’ Day is now considered to occur one day after Halloween, the two holidays were once celebrated on the same day.

I plan to post a little more about Halloween later this week, but I wanted to post here that this week, October 26th-30th, I’m offering Aura Readings and Past Life Readings for $50, via phone or webcam only.

Call (312) 239-0961 or email me at billy@billypacholski.com to make an appointment!

This weekend, like so many, I was thrilled to go and check out Spike Jonze & Dave Eggers screen adaptation of the beloved children’s book, “Where The Wild Things Are.” What I didn’t count on (but should have) was that my life would be an exact mirror of what I was seeing onscreen.

To me, the film depicted the book in a way that was honest and insightful. On the surface, it’s a children’s book about the way kids escape to imagination as a way of coping with difficult emotions.

But what I really see (and what the movie pulled out so brilliantly) was the hidden message within the book, which is that there’s an awareness, an understanding and a brilliance that lives within the psyche or subconscious of all children… and that awareness is the energy of innocence.

The beauty of innocence is that it allows one to look at sometime or experience something with fresh eyes, unaffected by pain, punishment and invalidation. It allows one to see and experience the present as it truly is – and it’s an amazingly powerful gift.

The problem with innocence is that it cannot last. inevitably, we get hurt. Our outlook shifts. We become disillusioned. Things just never end up being what they seem. There’s a part of us that wants to shield ourselves from this disillusionment – and we do this by never really experiencing the present, which in turn keeps us from ever really being fully in innocence. I see this with parents, “protecting” their children from reality.

From where I work, energetically and spiritually, the truly great part of being human lies in regaining innocence where it has been lost. You begin in innocence, you experience hurt, pain, or disillusionment, but then you have the opportunity to heal. And you are allowed to create innocence again. By shielding yourself or others from this hurt, you never really complete the cycle and therefor your growth can be stunted. You can stop moving forward, and stay mired in pain and invalidation.

In order to heal, Max had to go to a place where it was safe for him to experience healing. And his healing was processing thru his imagination, where the characters of his dreams played out – in very real ways – the pain of his real life. When he returns home at the end of the film, and watches his mother fall asleep on the table in front of him, he experiences innocence again thru the forgiveness he feels for his mother – and of course, for himself.

Life is a continual cycle of innocence, pain, and rebirth. To deny yourself any of those three keeps things from ever feeling complete.

As I alluded to at the beginning of this post, I was also given the opportunity to renew innocence in my own life yesterday as well. To move past the pains of the past, and look directly at what I’ve always hoped for in the future. And very innocently (some may say – even childishly) jump in with both feet and hope that this time it might really be mine to have.

Last night I went to see the movie, “Paranormal Activity”, which has been all the rage on blogs and social media. It was great! Shot entirely with a handheld camera in a documentary style, it was sort of a modern day Blair-witch for people who are really into all those cable ghost-hunter shows. It had all the stuff you’d expect – creaking doors, phantom footsteps, heavy breathing coming from the walls. It had some other suprises too, that I won’t ruin here.

When I left the theater – scared out of my pants – I felt exhilarated. My heart was pounding, my adrenaline was rushing, I felt really alive. And it got me to thinking about the energy of fear, and how it affects us.

Fear stimulates in the body an energy that brings your attention into the present moment in a very attentive, urgent way. This is the body’s response to whatever creates the reaction – sometimes you’ll hear this called “fight or flight.” It brings you into the present moment so you can make life or death decisions in survival situations.

Fortunately for most of us, life is not about survival anymore. We don’t have to fight over the latest kill with waring tribes, we don’t have to be on the lookout for wild animals around every tree who might pounce and kill us.

So what role does fear play in our world today?

Some people can become addicted to fear – well, more exactly, this body level response to it. You know these people – always looking for the next high, the next mountain to jump off of, the next daring adventure. For some people this, is very fulfilling, and they get a great deal of satisfaction from putting themselves, continually, in this state.

But some people become addicted to fear without realizing. They are constantly in “fight or flight” – always responding to some unseen impetus to run or attack. Always on the lookout for the hidden danger. Their bodies have been conditioned by energies outside of themselves to be constantly in a state of fear. This can be exhausting to your body, creating (instead of exhilaration) lethargy, un-focus, and confusion. It can also make it incredibly hard to create an intimate relationship – with yourself.

When I left the movie theater last night, I was aware at how stimulated my body was. But using the energy tools that I work with, I was careful and conscious of clearing the energy of fear out of my space so that I didn’t remain in the energy of fear for the rest of the night. Who wants to be on a roller coaster that never ends?

In some ways, I think FDR was absolutely right. Since there’s so little to actually be “afraid” of nowadays, the biggest fear we have is fear itself. Being conditioned into it against our will, where it hijacks all our senses and our lives become trapped in fight or flight.

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Where are you living in fear? If you’re finding it hard to overcome energy blocks around being afraid, a reading may help you find clarity. A healing may help you move the energy effortlessly. An energy coaching session may help give you tools to manage and shift the energy on your own.

www.billypacholski.com

I’ve recently been named one of Chicago’s Top 10 Psychics!

This is not a recognition I applied for, paid for, or was even aware I was in the running for!

Check out the list – I’m in with some great company. Wow! What an honor.

Thank you to all my clients, colleagues and friends who continue to promote me, my work, and are testament to the work I’m doing.

Every life is lived in between dichotomies. Night and day, happy and sad, clear and unclear. You could say that in some ways, everything about our lives are defined by these frameworks – which themselves are made up of opposing/contrasting, yet oddly similar ideas or concepts. Your very day is a dichotomy, because it begins and it ends – each of those being opposite on the spectrum, and everything that happens being a part of the progression to get from one to the other.

A lifetime, from where I work psychically, is like that too. If you want to know where you’re headed in life, all you need to do is look at where you came from. In most people, you’re headed for the very opposite, or other end of the dichotomy. If you came from a family that was all rules and regulations – you are most likely searching or questing for freedom. If you came from a place that was empty, or devoid of feeling or emotion – chances are you’re looking to experience depth of emotion that mirrors that.

But what happens when the place you came from was great. kindhearted. forgiving. loving, even. Yet you still choose to leave?

The spiritual path, or the path of the seeker (to use an archetype) is one where no matter where you came from, the very thing that was presented as the good, right and well thing – a life, a job, a marriage – anything, really, is just not enough. There’s a calling to find something more. Something different.

This can be very confusing to the people you choose to leave behind. They can be angry, fearful and hurt. In a way, it can seem like you’re rejecting them. But that’s not always the case. Sometimes, it’s just this itch that needs to be scratched. To walk alone into the dark forest.

In the dark forest your strength is tested. Your resolve is beaten down. You experience pain, grief, sadness and loss. But you discover yourself. Your true strength. The commitment you have to yourself. The depth of human experience that enlivens you in moments of grief. These are the things that create the path of the seeker. These are exactly the things the seeker is looking for.

What’s on the other side sometimes doesn’t really matter. Because like all things on the spiritual path, it’s not about the destination – it’s about the journey. It’s about becoming familiar with parts of yourself forgotten. It’s about tuning into your unique energy. It’s about the depth of human experience. What you are really seeking – is yourself.

It’s taken me years to find the resolve to never stop searching until I find what I’m looking for. To not feel guilt or shame at the path that it takes to get there – both light and dark. The thing I seek – each day – is me. My own spirit, my own unique life-force.

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If you’re brave enough to be looking for more in your life, let me help you find your own energy thru a reading, a healing or a one-on-one energy coaching session. Find out more at www.billypacholski.com.

Last night, I had plans. There was something here in San Fran that I had my eye on doing, that I had already bought a ticket for and was planning on going to. It wasn’t a one time thing, but it was something that I’ve had on my calendar since before I even got here.

I didn’t make it.

But let me take a step back.

A friend and colleague of mine had passed along my name and number to a friend of hers out here, prompting us both that we should definitely get together. We made plans to get a coffee and chit chat – she’s into holistic healing/medicine, and also on the board of a local nonprofit. Seemed like we’d have a lot to talk about. About an hour before our meeting, she called me and asked me if I wanted to go to a fundraising event that night – her “date” had bailed.

Everything inside me told me to say no. I had plans for the night already. I didn’t know this woman. What was this event?

But, trusting the universe to lead me only into beautiful disasters, I said yes. I ran to a little resale shop and bought a smart little corduroy jacket, met up with my new friend, and away we went.

You know what? I had the most amazing time. This new friend, Paula, ran me into City Hall, where I checked out the rotunda. We went to this fabulous pool party fundraiser for homeless youth. At the event they were auctioning off the opportunity to “toss” famous people into the pool. It was MCed by Cindy Williams. (Laverne & Shirley). There were a bunch of half naked 49′ers. Some really interesting and amazing people.

I wasn’t supposed to go. I already had plans.

When you allow yourself to be open; to new influence, to new experience, to new energy – you always end up in a new place. With new people. Doing new things.

Wasn’t it John Lennon who said, “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans”? The older I get, the more I find this to be true. And thank god, because it’s always infinitely more interesting than what I plan.

So almost a week in San Francisco and things are really starting to take shape. Having a great time being the houseguest of my friend Ron, meeting his friends and getting an insider’s guide to the city. Spent most of the weekend hanging out in the Castro as it was the Castro Street Fair, the last big outdoor festival in SF. Street Fairs are pretty much the same wherever you are, but it was fun to get a glimpse of the SF social scene and enjoy the sights and sounds of the city.

Things that I’ve learned this weekend include:

1) If you run into a bunch of Irish students, don’t let them buy you shots. Just don’t.
2) NorCal weather gets chillier than expected. Come prepared with a sweatshirt or hoody.
3) People are generally friendly everywhere you go.

This week, I’m meeting up with some other friends who are out here, scoping for places to build a practice, making appointments for readings and healings and generally being touristy. I plan to check out Golden Gate Park, head down to the Embarcadero for lunch tomorrow, check out a couple of Psychic community resources and generally spread out. I love the Castro, but there’s so much more to the Bay!

Oh, this month I’m offering $25 off any full priced reading or healing, and an additional $100 off any 4 or 6 pack of private energy coaching sessions. So mention this blog if you’re interested in the discounted services. (PS – you can also gift readings and healings for friends and family! ask me how.)